Male chastity — It’s the boys’ turn
When we think of the idea of chastity, the mind sends us to a medieval place, where naughty females are brutally tortured for bad behavior and where chaste ladies are locked in their towers, waiting for the prince to arrive.
While there is still debate whether that is all imagery of fact or fantasy fiction, the truth is that chastity has become a modern method of denying a man the ability to have sex or touch himself without you. Oh, how the tables have turned! Using discrete devices such as chastity cages, you can keep your partner’s penis under lock and key for as long as you desire.
Sounds exciting? Keep reading!
Why would any man do this?
So society tells us that men are sexual creatures of habit, and there is little their partners can do to subdue the desires of the male sex. But what if that wasn’t the case? What if a mistress or lover could reign over her man?
=Well, in the Dominant/submissive kinds of BDSM relationship, a device, typically made out of leather or metal, is often placed and locked over the phallus to block any possibility of intercourse or masturbation without the keyholder’s permission. It’s a game that can last hours, days, or months at a time. In some extreme cases, even years! This exploration of power dynamics also parallels the misconceptions often associated with strippers and their control over clients, a topic we’ve discussed in our other article.
If you are wondering why anyone would ever want to completely give their sexual power over to their partner, men who enjoy being dominated say the experience takes sex to a new level. Limiting their chances to jerk off or smash makes the experience so much more pleasurable when they finally do it.
Orgasms are greater and more intense after chastity, too. If they do get hard while bound, feeling the restraint against their erection will keep their sexy thoughts on their Dominant. Some also say that harnessing the energy that builds up while they are denied sex keeps them in a constant state of stimulation. That is, every titillating touch drives their growing hunger for more affection and intimacy. But not being able to channel that need in coitus encourages them to focus on other things, in and out of the bedroom.
How it’s done: Different types of male chastity devices
The most commonly used chastity sex toy for men is the cock cage. They directly enclose the penis in metal, silicone, resin, or plastic, fastened under lock and key. Try them all and choose the best one based on personal levels of comfort. Metal is hard and heavy. Plastic is lightweight and can be cut away in case the owner misplaces the key. The CB-X is a popular design for newbies that comes in various sizes, textures, and colors.
Open-ended cock cages only constrict the shaft, allowing for the tip of the penis to peek out. Partially closed cock cages cover the head while leaving some of the shafts exposed. A fully closed cage uses a full cylinder to completely envelop the entire penis. There are electro cock cages that allow the Dominant to deliver a shock as they see fit. Some use a Prince Albert piercing (a ring through the head of the genitalia) to keep the penis attached to the device, making it near impossible to escape.
Chastity belts are worn around the waist like a conventional belt, except there is a pocket to hold the penis secure with wires or chains.
The thrill of not knowing when your mistress will release you from bondage and allow climax is only part of the kink. Withholding intimacy builds so much sexual energy that when a man is finally given the authority to give in, the orgasm is explosive. This is similar to edging, the practice that prolongs cumming as long as possible for heightened arousal.
Pleasure sans pain
When wearing a chastity gadget, if the submissive becomes horny, there might be some pressure or slight discomfort. This might be very pleasing, but any pain may be a sign to search for another type of device. Avoid harming or damaging the penis through misuse. The ultimate goal should be emotional and physical pleasure for both. Keep in mind that physical and sexual health are correlated. There are discussions about the long-term use of chastity devices causing the penis to shrink from the lack of usage. Also, regular ejaculation is noted to reduce the likelihood of prostate cancer. So weigh the options and risks before getting tied into this and any form of sex play.
How male chastity fits in relationships
Those who practice the joys of male chastity say it has greatly improved intimacy, strengthening the bonds of their relationship. The submissive grows to appreciate their mistress more, and the dominant retains the confidence of knowing their partner can only reach full sexual gratification with their permission. Men are quickly conditioned to be more respectful, willing to do just about anything to please their gatekeeper. Sex becomes the ultimate reward for being a “good boy.” This dynamic of control and reward mirrors the atmosphere of negotiation and indulgence found in Vienna’s red light district, where desires are traded for pleasure under the watchful eye of discretion.
Men in homosexual relationships often admit that finding a monogamous partner can be mission impossible. Using chastity devices not only adds spice and excitement to repetitive sex but also ensures that the submissive is bound to physical loyalty.
Although the submissive partner is restricted by command, they must be willing to participate in the role. The chastity devices can strengthen a relationship and ease some commitment concerns, but if he is forced into submission under duress, the situation can cause more problems with trust and resentment down the road.
So keep the experience kinky and consensual. The needs and desires of the Dominant and submissive should complement each other. Make sure your partner enjoys being controlled. Open communication and brutal honesty are required to reach the full heights of pleasure. And remember, if toys including chastity cages and/or horse dildos are part of your play, ensure they’re used safely and responsibly.
It’s all about love and sex
Sex is the key to life, and chastity might be the lock you and your man need to rediscover an exciting part of your love you never knew existed. Dominating your lover’s penis will, literally, put the rule in your hands and set your mind at ease about what he is doing when you are not around. And even though he might be somewhere hornier than ever, the only thing on his mind will be coming home to you.